I have never posted or commented enough on others' blogs to really build a support system. I need the accountability and the connection to others who have or are going through the process of weight loss with the band. SO I am asking for followers who I can support and will support me as well. I need to live and breath my life with the band. I often do not consider how drastically my life has and needs to change.
I know there is no excuse to spend thousands and make a commitment to changing your life and then not changing it. I am down 22 pounds but for 9 months after surgery I do not think that is acceptable. I have not stopped eating my emotions, eating sweets (cake, cookies, ice cream), and consistently exercising. I am not mad at myself but the band. I have a confession....from August to the beginning of January I was smoking. I haven't smoked in 6+ weeks and although I crave it at times I know I will not. I know I cannot possibly rationalize why that is ok when I am working on my spiritual, mental, and physical health. I feel like a weak person who needs to feel some out....some way to let the stress out. I work full time and am a single mom. I have friends who are either my age with no kids or older friends with families. The bottom line is I am lonely, carrying a lot of responsibility by myself, and can only pull myself out of this slump for little bits of time.
I am scheduled for a fill March 17th. Between now and then I am going to see what happens when I truly stick to the program and work WITH the band and not against it. I know this is possible. Many of you are proof of that!!
It is hardest to find time to exercise.I have a really nice elliptical. I wake up at 5 every morning and leave (or try) to leave the house between 6:30-6:45. My daughter will wake anytime between 5-6:15 SO if I try to workout there is a big chance she will wake up extrememly grumpy and will now have to stay with me while I shower and get ready. It makes for an extra hectic morning and is frustrating because there have been times I have to stop my workout half way. In the evenings, we ge home between 6:00-6:30 99% of the time. Now I race to fix dinner, spend time with my daughter, get ready for bed, etc. and end up not being able to think about exercising until between 8 and 9. At that point I am exhausted and do not want to shower before bed. I am just going to have to do it but I can only run on no sleep for so long (my daughter or my puppy frequently wakes me in the night)!
Being a single mom and finding time to exercise must be nearly impossible. Since you can't find very much time, I would focus on your eating. I'm a big believer that eating is about 80% of it. Sleep is very important as well. Try not to stress about your past failures or even your future failures for that matter. You don't need to add that to your life. Just do the best you can and make the best food choices you can. It may take you a little longer than some people, but you are moving in the right direction and that's what's important. Blogging about your feelings may also help with some of the stress. There are so many people in this community who will reach out to help you. Just keep blogging, you'll see.
ReplyDeleteI understand the not having time. You just have to make time. It is possible. I agree with Sarah also though that eating is 80% of it all. Work on getting your eating under control and the exercise will fall in place. Blogging really helps me through my process, or when things aren't going as "planned." I am almost 9 months from surgery too.
ReplyDeleteOk I went back and read your story. You were banded 2 days before me!
ReplyDeleteYou can so do this!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Sarah, you need to get your eating on track first of all. Add in the exercise gradually as you can.
Please blog your stresses and feelings instead of eating them! We're here for you!
Sarah G
www.nwanonymom.blogspot.com
Oh hun! I'm so sorry that you're in such a tough place. Nice to meet you. You can count on me to support and encourage you. I'll read often and help when I can. Good job on the smoking! I am still struggling with that- I know it erodes the tissue around the band and I'm down to 2-4 cigs a day but it's HARD. So I applaud you for that. Exercise is important but don't beat yourself up about it. Try for weekends for now. Focus on your diet first. Sounds like you need that fill too. If you don't have resistance then it's harder to be motivated too when you don't feel like the band is working, you know what I mean? Trust me, the diet is the most important part of the weight loss and you CAN do it. As someone who was (is) a carb addict/sweet tooth I can vouch for you that it IS possible. Start slow- baby steps- and you know what? Kajun Gumbo (forgot her name but that's her blog) told me to a great idea- make a box for yourself- put little goodies in it (not food) and give yourself one goodie for every 5 pounds you lose. Fun huh? Just reward yourself all the time and be proud and happy for every single ounce that you lose. Don't beat yourself up anymore!!! Good luck and best wishes.
ReplyDeleteIt's VERY hard to get out of the habits of eating your feelings, which is sounds like you're still doing essentially. But since I've been blogging consistently and being accountable with my friends on here, I've lost more weight than I believe I EVER would have on my own.
ReplyDeleteI'm also a single mom and understand the hectic lifestyle that having kids and trying to lose weight and all that entails. So if you're looking for someone to support you - I'm definitely here for you. Lean on all of us and we'll give you the support and encouragement to continue your journey and be a success.
Good luck. :)
http://bandumentary.blogspot.com
I'm really struggling too and know how you feel. I have no idea what to suggest regarding exercise, do you have a lunch break at work? Could you go for a walk maybe?
ReplyDeleteYou're not alone!
Hi Ashlylin, I just found your blog. It sounds like you have identified some steps to improving your situation - getting a fill and trying to fit in more exercise. Good job addressing and working on these difficult areas!
ReplyDeleteGetting to the point where you have good restriction is such an important part of working your band successfully. Before you get to the "sweet spot" you're essentiall dieting and we all know how that goes! Once you have good restriction, however, it is a very powerful tool that makes weight loss much easier.
I noticed you mentioned you have a puppy. I have a dog and I walk him every day. Dog behavior and training is much easier when they get regular exercise and for most dogs 20-30 minutes a day is plenty. A 10 minute walk in the morning and evening wouldn't require much change in your routine and would boost your exercise at the same time. Just a suggestion to consider!
22 lbs. down is great! I'm sure you wish it was more and the weight was coming off faster, but it will come. Just keep getting regular fills and trying to follow the good bandster rules (eat slowly, chew thouroughly, no drinking with meals, protein first). You can do this!
http://amandakiska.blogspot.com
I just want to reach out a give you a cyber hug! Hang in there..you are obviously taking the time to understand your entire well being--emotionally, physically and more and that is so important. It takes a lot of soul searching to find out who we are and why we do the things we do. Hang in there! You can do it. And you are so right the band bloggers can be such great support and motivation. :)
ReplyDeleteOkay. So let us see. (Im putting on my thinking cap). Your post before this one said that you do not eat much in the morning, and that the good food is hard to eat. Have you ever thought that maybe you are too tight? I worry that needind a small fill is not what you need! A fill will not help prevent us from eating the crappy food that keeps the scale from moving. Ya know what I mean? Even with good restriction you should be able to eat something healthy in the morning. With the chicken, eggs, etc...that you are having problems with, do you think it is because you are eating them too fast, not chewing enough, etc? Trying to eat too much? Try picking your protein and cutting it into pea sized pieces, and putting your fork down between bites. See if you can eat 4 ounces. If you can...do you feel full and stay full for 3-4 hours?
ReplyDeleteIn the mornign can you do greek yogurt?
Getting super hungry during the day for sure leads to overeating at night.
Those are just some of my thoughts.
Email me if you have any other questions of want to tell me to shut up :)
I know how you feel with lack of time. it's hard. I work 11 hour days and spend about 40 minutes commuting, each way. sending you some positive thoughts, you can do this and I'm here anytime for you!
ReplyDeleteEveryone has given some excellent advice. I have one more suggestion to add, do you get typical hour lunch at work ? Try walking or if your in a building with steps, bring an Mp3 player+sneakers to work & try to do 30-40 mins a day. Blog, blog, blog even if it's just to post your food intake!
ReplyDeleteSet short 5lb goals & reward yourself (non-food)
You can do this!!! I believe in you!!!
ReplyDelete(((HUGS)))
~S
Hello friend, I haven't been banded yet but love my banded buddies. We are here for you, keep blogging and we will respond.
ReplyDeleteI agree that you need to get more food in during the day to help overeating at night.
I have been banded just 6 months next weekend, and I am only down 30. It is very hard to change those mental issues. So that is what continues to thwart me as well. But we won't give up, will we?? I hope your fill helps! For me, I'm hoping a de-fill will help, lol.
ReplyDeleteI'm a new follower (thanks to Amanda), and I'm willing to help! I'm a smoker, too...I never quit when I had the surgery. I'm not a single mom, but I'm a teacher and work 60-80 hours a week because of all of the extracurricular things I do with my job. Ever need a friend? Feel free to e-mail me at joiajones@gmail.com or hit me up on Facebook!
ReplyDeleteAmanda sent me your way also. I can't imagine trying to do all you do as a single mom. I find it hard to find time to fit everything in even with a hubby to help out. All that being said, you can do this! I find so much support here. It helps keep me accountable and my mind in the game, so to speak. There's a great community here that's always willing to help someone in need. Feel free to email me if you ever need to vent. I'm clickable.
ReplyDeleteI came to your blog via Amanda too! I was just banded a little over a month ago. Please know that the blog world is so supportive and I find it's one of the biggest elements in my journey! Good luck to you and believe in yourself!
ReplyDeleteAmanda
www.thebandontherun.blogspot.com
Hi Ashlylin! I'm Stephanie and I'm a new follower. Amanda sent me. I know how hard it can be to squeeze exercise in - I work full time, commute an hour each way, and go to school. There's just never enough time. How old is your daughter? Is there any way you can make the time you spend with her in the evening active? You'd still have to shower, but maybe playing ball or something like that. The other thing I try to do is go for a walk on my lunch break. Any way you could work that in? Good luck - I know it is hard but you can do it!
ReplyDelete